Writing Tips
for clarity and concisenessArchive for June, 2008
Possessive with Two Nouns
The possessive case can be confusing, especially when two nouns are doing the possessing. Fortunately, The Chicago Manual of Style sheds light on this conundrum.
Chicago says that when two nouns “possess” the same entity, only the second takes an apostrophe (‘):
my aunt and uncle’s house
Gilbert and Sullivan’s lolanthe
Minneapolis and Saint Paul’s transportation system
On the other hand, when two nouns possess different entities, both possessives take an apostrophe:
my aunt’s and uncle’s specific talents
New York’s and Chicago’s transportation systems
our friends’ and neighbors’ children
Isn’t that neat?
If any writing questions have you stumped, send them in. I’ll check them out for you.
Cheers,
Tara Treasurefield
Tara’s Writing Studio
Number Contest Winner
The winner is Dina Roberts. You can get to know her at her blog, Let Them Eat Corn. Congratulations, Dina!
Here is the sentence that needed work:
In his office, there was a fax machine, two four-drawer file cabinets, and an old tangerine-colored iMac.
And this is how Dina fixed it:
In his office, there were a fax machine, two four-drawer file cabinets, and an old tangerine-colored Mac.
Dina changed the singular verb was to the plural verb were, because the subject is plural (fax machine, two four-drawer file cabinets, and an old tangerine-colored iMac.
When the subject follows the verb in a sentence, and it’s difficult to see what’s what, reversing the order often helps:
A fax machine, two four-drawer file cabinets, and an old tangerine-colored Mac was in his office.
Sounds funny, doesn’t it? That’s because with the subject first, it’s glaringly obvious that it’s plural and needs a plural verb.
Dina also made another change:
I changed iMac to Mac because in the Mac world, Macs are already older than iMacs.
That’s fine, but I’d leave it alone. Specificity gives writing substance and creates a visual image–in this case, the very specific visual image of an old tangerine-colored iMac.
And if the only tangerine-colored Macs are iMacs, that’s all the more reason to let iMac stand.
Cheers,
Tara Treasurefield
Tara’s Writing Studio
Number Contest
Here’s the second of the two contests I promised yesterday. This one centers on number.
Do you see the problem with the sentence below, and do you have a solution? If so, let me know. I’ll post the winner’s name and other information in this blog.
[In his office], there was a fax machine, two four-drawer file cabinets, and an old tangerine-colored iMac.
Cheers,
Tara Treasurefield
Tara’s Writing Studio
Usage Contest
To make up for not running a contest in quite awhile, I’m posting one today and another tomorrow.
If you are the first person to correct both sentences, I’ll mention your name and other information you’d like to see here in two different posts.
Here’s the first sentence. Explain what’s wrong and send in your corrected version.
How would you like to be my second eyes and ears around here, Joe?
Cheers,
Tara Treasurefield
Copulative Verbs
What the heck are copulative verbs?
Until last night, I didn’t have a clue. But thanks to The Copyeditor’s Handbook, by Amy Einsohn, I now know that copulative verbs are “verbs that express a state of being, rather than an action.” A few examples are be, become, feel, seem, smell, sound, taste.
Like good meditators, copulative verbs don’t just do something; they sit there and be. And because they express being rather than doing, they are unique among verbs in that they are modified by adjectives, not adverbs.
Here are some examples of modified copulative verbs, taken from The Copyeditor’s Handbook:
I am fine; he became sad; she feels bad; they felt ill; you seem happy.
This fish smells bad; the band’s new song sounds good; the souffle tastes delicious.
This next example, also from the Handbook, shows the dissonance that can result when an action verb winds up in the same sentence with copulative verbs:
Identical twins may look different, sound different, and walk differently.
See? Look and sound are copulative verbs, so they are modified by the adjective different. Then along comes walk, an action verb that requires the adverb differently. Jarring, isn’t it?
Amy’s advice:
For euphony [harmony] change the final item to “have different ways of walking.”
Cheers,
Tara Treasurefield
Ex- Very Punny
Just thought I’d tell you about an exchange I had some years ago with a friend.
Judging by the constant commotion, especially when I was trying to sleep, rats were having a grand old time in the attic of the cottage I lived in at that time. It might have been alright, except that I was having trouble sleeping. And, there was a good chance that I may soon find rats in my bedroom or kitchen.
I finally admitted that it would be wise to call an exterminator. To do as little harm as possible, I chose one who uses traps, not poison.
After the exterminator had come and gone, a friend stopped by. I said, “The exterminator was here today.”
She replied, “Oh, really? What does he do now?”
Get it? A pun is a play on words. Think “Ex (as in former) terminator.”
Cheers,
Tara Treasurefield
Tara’s Writing Studio
Fuzzy Sentence Structure
Last week, I heard this on the radio:
She is a former prosecutor and author.
Because of the way the words are arranged, the meaning is fuzzy. Does the adjective “former” modify both “prosecutor” and “author”? Or does it modify “prosectutor” alone? In other words, is the woman who is the subject of this sentence both a former prosecutor and a former author? Or is she a former prosecutor who now writes?
If it’s the latter, a little bit of rearranging would make that clear:
She is an author and a former prosecutor.
Here’s another option:
A former prosecutor, she is now an author.
Cheers,
Tara Treasurefield
Tara’s Writing Studio
Concise Sentence Structure
A quick example on this lucky Friday the 13th:
President Bush has threatened Iran with military action if it fails to stop enriching uranium.
There are no grammatical errors in this sentence. But “if it fails to stop” twists my mind around. It would be more direct to put it like this:
President Bush has threatened Iran with military action unless it stops enriching uranium.
Or like this:
President Bush has threatened Iran with military action if it continues enriching uranium.
Questions? Comments?
Tara Treasurefield
Tara’s Writing Studio
Satire in Action
I witnessed the 1964-1965 Free Speech Movement at the University of California at Berkeley. At issue was the administration’s ban on on-campus political activities, which the students protested was an infringement on their right to free speech and academic freedom. Over the course of that year, the police arrested hundreds of protesters.
Sometimes, a protest took the form of satire. One particularly imaginative student sat at a card table on the sidewalk in front of the Student Union, displaying a sign that read “phucque.” This was his creative way of spelling a word that the university administration had censored.
When I asked him what he hoped to accomplish, he replied, “I just want to see if they arrest me.” As far as I know, he wasn’t arrested–maybe because of the unique spelling and because he never said the word out loud.
Meanwhile, the leaders of the Free Speech Movement began using “confront” as a euphemism for the forbidden word. Apparently unaware of the euphemism, the Chancellor of the university began a public address about the administration’s position with the words, “We really want to confront the students on this issue.”
Here’s part of the Wikipedia.com definition of satire:
In satire, human or individual vices, follies, abuses, or shortcomings are held up to censure by means of ridicule, derision, burlesque, irony, or other methods, ideally with the intent to bring about improvement. Although satire is usually meant to be funny, the purpose of satire is not primarily humor in itself so much as an attack on something of which the author strongly disapproves, using the weapon of wit.
Cheers,
Tara Treasurefield
Tara’s Writing Studio
Principal and Principle
When I was in high school, I had the good fortune to land in Mr. Crowlie’s American History class. He was passionate about his subject and about teaching, and his principal goal was to inspire us to think for ourselves, rather than regurgitate what we had read or heard.
I was among the handful of students who gladly skipped school assemblies, choosing instead to spend those precious hours in Mr. Crowlie’s classroom, discussing the great ideas of our times. I also attended Saturday afternoon coffee klatches, a series of casual meetings led by Mr. Crowlie and hosted by one or another of our parents. We drank coffee, ate pastry, and discussed democracy, liberty, freedom, education, economics. It was exhilarating!
It was also short-lived. Brilliant though he was, my favorite teacher was anything but tactful, and his rebellious nature and wry sense of humor got him into deep trouble.
Standing on the principle that such a uniquely qualified teacher should remain in front of the classroom, his students rallied to his defense. I tried to help by stopping by the junior high school I had attended and asking the principal if he would speak in support of Mr. Crowlie at his dismissal hearing.
The principal’s answer was no. But he did give me an unsolicited lesson in spelling and English usage. As I left his office, he pointed to the sign above the door and said, PrinciPAL, stressing the last three letters.
I didn’t agree that he was my pal. But I did begin to see the differences between principal and principle.
The two words are homophones: They sound the same, and in addition to being spelled differently, they have different meanings:
When used as a noun, principal means head or chief
When used as an adjective, principal means main or most important
Principle is a noun that means rule or standard.
Cheers,
Tara Treasurefield
Tara’s Writing Studio
